The Patient Woman - Part III: Be Patient with Yourself
It’s true what they said - You never truly know what it’s like to be a mom until you are one. From the moment your child comes into your life, nothing is the same. There are many things about motherhood that can be taught, like what to feed a baby and what to do when they have a little sniffle. But learning what it takes to get through your tough mommy moments only comes with experience. Due to pressures from society, our perception of how we, as women, should handle motherhood has been tarnished.
In this third and final part in our series, The Patient Woman, we want to shine a light on the false expectations versus realities of motherhood – and focus on being patient with yourself in addition to your children. Doing so will improve your quality of life and help you be the best mother you can be for your family.
Give Yourself Time
Moms, especially new moms, often feel like motherhood should come naturally and that you must be perfect nurturers immediately. This is not the case – and like everything else in life, there is a learning curve for this unique role. You were chosen by God to take on this divine assignment, so give yourself time! The reality is that once a mom, always a mom. The experiences and stages change, but it’s a continuous cycle that starts in infancy and ends with death. Once you “master” the infant stage (i.e., changing diapers, feeding, etc.), you’ll immediately be thrust into learning to adjust to the toddler stage (temper tantrums, daycare sniffles, etc.). And once you master the toddler stage, you’ll be on your way to teaching your elementary school child his or her ABCs and how to tie shoestrings. Oh, and then there are the wonderful middle school years of watching your child morph into a tween – and then onto teenage years. But even still, being a mother continues into adulthood. And the reality is that we must take the time to adjust to being a mom at the moment, every day – and accept all that comes with it. It’s okay if we don’t get everything right the first time. Not being patient with ourselves causes unnecessary stress that can be detrimental to both our children and to ourselves. n
Thrive in Your Reality
Though learning from other mothers in your family and community can provide helpful tips, it is important not to compare yourself to them. Their reality is not your reality. Every child is different, therefore there is no one size fits all template for parenting. Comparing yourself to others whom you feel are “better mothers” will only bring self-doubt and discourage you from hurdling over whatever roadblocks you encounter. God wants us to be patient with ourselves because he is trying to teach us something with every challenge we are given. Not using societal expectations as the standard for motherhood will allow you to see the beauty of whatever stage of your journey you are in.
Every Season of Motherhood Brings New Challenges
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
Motherhood is a journey, not a destination. Each stage is unique, each season is exciting in its own way, and each milestone has its rewards and challenges. God has chosen you to be his vessels – to nurture, train up and bless a child (or two). He doesn’t expect perfection. He knows that some days will be amazing and others will be tough – but there will exponentially be more good days than bad. And in the world of motherhood, you will never suffer from boredom! This is why you must remember to remain patient and acknowledge that as your child grows and changes, so will you. It’s natural. It’s normal. It’s okay! remember to look to God for help. And embrace and enjoy every moment because, in the blink of an eye, your “baby” will be an adult. It’s true what they say – “they grow up so fast!!!”
We hope you’ve enjoyed this series on The Patient Woman, and pray that it’s touched your soul.